I know, I know. It’s been a hot minute since I have been social, much less taken the time to sit down and do some writing. My coffee is done brewing, so let me grab that and we’ll start. (a few moments later) Truth is I’ve had a lot going on lately and I just needed to take some time away from people, virtual or in person. This month would have been my 21st anniversary, so that has been affecting me a bit along with some other drama being stirred up. Parenting can be tough, especially when you have two different methods and they compete while being separated. I have gotten a number of emails and messages from you all, and I greatly appreciate your concern and checking up on me. I’ve had a couple readers ask me about how nudity or being a nudist has affected my mental health, or how to cope with a limited amount of time to be naked when being naked brings so much happiness. I was going to send an email back to each person giving my thoughts, but I needed a good topic to write about, and I needed a bit of motivation to get my butt in gear and start writing. At least it can get my mind off everything else. I apologize in advance if this post seems to be a bit…scatter brained? I have a lot of thoughts that are about to spew out, so please try to follow my madness.
It goes without saying the last 12 months have been rather difficult for most of us. The outbreak of COVID-19 essentially sparked a paradigm shift for the entire world. Anyone who could work from home did, those who couldn’t had to risk infection by going in, or you were among the many who essentially lost their job due to furloughs or business closings. It’s been quite difficult and one that has caused a great deal of stress, anxiety, and depression. I would love to see the stats on the number of people who sought out mental health services during this time. Personally, I immediately saw an increase in my stress levels just because we were all home 24/7 with no way to decompress. There was no commute to give us that “me” time we all desire, and we seemed to go from one room to the next with no break in duties, especially for parents of small children. Reminds me a bit of my post A Shackled Nudist and that feeling of being…trapped. Trying to work and home school at the same time adds an exponential amount of stress.
Rise In Naked Time
I’ve always considered myself a “nudist” or at least adverse to clothing, and I would be naked any chance I got. Even as a kid, my clothes would come off at some point. Not much has changed in adulthood except I’m much more conscience of when I choose to do it. My biggest concern is not offending or bothering someone else. It is my choice to be naked, and not their choice to see me. As the pandemic went on I started having more and more stress put on me. I had no means to escape the constant calling of work in my office, chores around the house, or the demands of my family. I love my family to death, but I needed some space and me time. Seeing what this was doing to me I made the choice to add things into my life that would bring me some peace and happiness. The first thing I started doing was sleeping naked again. I finally gave up on the worry of being questioned or that my special needs daughter would get in bed with us in the middle of the night. I needed to sleep good at night, and the best way for me to do that was be as comfortable as I could be. So, I would go to bed first and keep a shirt next to the bed to put on if need be. I went to bed first so I wouldn’t be questioned why I was sleeping naked, and the shirt would help cover up, if needed. It’s a shame I had to do that, but it was my “compromise” if I was going to do what helped me feel better. It was worth it to me.
The next thing I did was basically get up early in the morning so I could let the dog out, drink my coffee, and start work/my day in the buff. I did this everyday until about 10 or 11 when everyone started waking up. Although it was only like 4-6 hours a day in the morning, I immediately noticed a difference in how I felt mentally, and how I was feeling about myself physically. I did this for months and it was such a change in how I had lived before. I had decided that I needed this to feel better. As time went on and things started to fall apart in my marriage, it was this time alone in the nude that helped me to get through things. I was saddened how things were going, and I knew deep down there most likely wouldn’t be any reconciliation. This was made clear when we started living apart.
Back in late July-August time frame we had a conversation that solidified the separation and we essentially went our separate ways. I remained in the home and he went to his mom’s to stay. I didn’t have anywhere else to go since my family live back in my home state. We ended up splitting the time with the kids about 50/50. During the times they were away I pretty much lived naked 100% of the time. There were times that I would go 4-5 days without putting on a stitch of clothing. I had no need to. I bought groceries about once a week and I would cook all of my meals. The only time I put on clothes was if I needed to go outside or if someone came to the door. I can say without any reservation that my happiness increases and my general stress decreased the longer I was naked. Why is that? I think it is the simple fact that I like being clothes free, and it’s something I can do that brings me joy. I’m sure the same can be said if you’re playing your favorite board game, or visiting you favorite restaurant. Things you enjoy bring you happiness, and for me that is being without clothes. Also, as an added bonus, my body learned to regulate its temperature, so I don’t get cold as often, and my laundry is way dawn (like two, maybe three outfits a week). Generally, it’s a win-win for me. Full disclosure…I keep a small space heater next to my desk for when I am sitting still for a long period of time. 🙂
How To Increase Your Naked Time
For many people who feel they are more or less a “closet nudist”, it’s extremely difficult to find the time to be naked. Most of what I see and read essentially comes down to either work responsibilities, or their family does not understand or they don’t want to understand. The situation can be very difficult to work around because you don’t feel understood, they don’t want to understand, or maybe there is a level of shame that you can’t or don’t want to get rid of. I’ve been there. I get it. I’m sure you can ask almost any nudist, and they will tell you their story of how difficult it is at times, especially with friends and family. Even now, I have told no one in my family of my nudist lifestyle choice. Do I think they will understand? Most likely. I simply don’t like awkward situations, so I tend to avoid them when I can.
So what can you do to increase your naked time? Good question. I think that is the hardest question to answer for many who don’t have the liberty or support system around them. If you are younger and still live at home, then you may have some options to help give you that much needed time. I used to lock myself in my bedroom just to have my free time to be naked. Living in a blended house with a step-brother made it difficult, but I managed the best I could. I never ventured outside much to try the naked in nature scene. I think a lot of it was fear of being caught and me still not knowing there was a whole nudist culture/lifestyle out there. I wished I had known then what I know now!! If you are a young aspiring naturist reading this, then I encourage you to find that spot you can go to after school to decompress and relax. If you’re lucky enough to have a secluded enough place, then you can finish up your homework for the day while naked in nature! Oh to be young once again. Another thing I would do if I was younger is I would invite at least one close friend to try it with me. At least I wouldn’t feel like I was trying to go at it all alone, and I could have someone or someones “grow up” with me in naturism.
If you have a significant other or are married, then now is the time to talk to them about how you feel and what you need/want. I know it can feel embarrassing to bring up a topic like this because you feel like you will be judged. I spent many years feeling the same way, and I wished I had brought up the topic before I got married. At least I could have gotten it out there and let the chips fall where they may. I did not like the feeling I was hiding something or that I couldn’t talk to my significant other/spouse/etc about anything. It could have just been me and my trust issues. I’m sure that goes back to when my dad left my mom. I don’t know but I digress as usual. However, going forward it will be a topic to be brought up that I want and need to live some kind of clothes free life, and if it is a deal breaker for them, then it wasn’t meant to be I guess. Well that is if…BIG IF I find myself in any kind of relationship going forward. I would question any kind of relationship success if I felt like I couldn’t talk to my partner or potential partner about anything. Relationships are built on trust and if you can’t trust the one you love, then are you two truly in love?
Now, how do you broach the subject if you are in a serious, committed relationship and your partner/spouse doesn’t really know anything about naturism or your interest in it? I think a good place to start is to read this post at Naturist Place: How to enjoy nudity if you live with people who aren’t accustom to nudity. He gives you a really good perspective and ideas on how you can subtly bring the topic up to those you live with or who are close to you. I’ve read his post a number of times to get a few ideas. Also, there is another post you should read too: Naturist Place: Debunking the Misconceptions About Naturism. These can give you the tools needed to get you through the initial phase of “exposing” your naturist desires.
What do you do if those around you refuse to participate, allow,or ridicule you for you desire to be naked? Well, I guess you’re at a fork in the road where you have to make a decision. I will talk about what I would do or what I have done, but this may not be something for you to do. Nudity has been something that I had always enjoyed, and after different comments over the years, I knew the possibility of being nude at home was going to cause problems. At least bring forth comments that I didn’t need or want to hear.
Like I wrote before, I just made time for myself. That may sound selfish but I have been told by many family and friends that I need to take care of me if I’m going to take care of my kids/family. There is a lot of truth and wisdom to this that I never realized was so true. How can I give those around me the best version of me if I have no way of being my best? I’m not a person to run away from my problems, so it’s not like I can just up and leave my life behind. I took control and did what I needed to do to be my best. Part of that was to be naked when I could. Even if it was for an hour or two a day. I didn’t make any sudden changes in noticeable behavior, I didn’t really hide what I was doing, and I kept my same schedule without affecting anyone else. It helps that I am usually an early morning person, so rather than getting my day started in pj’s or comfy clothes, I just started my day naked.
Now, if this is something that you would like to try and do, then you will need to make sure that you don’t do anything shady or suspicious. Sudden changes in your behavior may spark questions from your significant other. “Why are you getting up so early?” “Why did you stop coming to bed with me, or why are you staying up later than normal?” Why does it take you so long to get home from work now?” What spouse/partner wouldn’t ask those questions? We are human and everyone is prone to that temptation, and we all know it, so what I consider to be the most important part is to not do anything shady or bring suspicion. I’m not saying you should hide what you’re doing, and if you get “caught” don’t act like you’re doing anything wrong. That will just make things worse. All you have to do is say that you wanted to sit naked while drinking coffee and reading emails. Just be ready for weird looks, scoffs, or even a few questions.
We’ve all seen the blog and news posts about how being naked can increase your happiness and body image, but it seems those who are not accustomed to the nudist lifestyle don’t want to partake. My challenge to you is simply this: For the month of April I want you to increase your naked time each day. Even if it’s just for a few minutes. If you can increase your naked time by 5 minutes each day, then you will have 2.5 hours of extra naked time for the month of April. A much better place than you were for the month of March. If you happen to be single and live alone, then I challenge you to live naked as much as your time allows. So if you currently watch TV with lounging pants and a shirt, then get naked and watch TV in the buff. You can cover up with a blanket if you need to. The goal is to NOT be wearing clothes.